Longing for GU-Q, for my Community

On the evening of April 8, my friend and I were driving around when we decided to head to GU-Q to get stuff from our lockers. Approaching one of Education City’s gates, we were met by barricades and a security guard. After some back and forth with the security guard we were able to go in. It was so quiet, with just a few cars passing by us. 

Approaching GU-Q felt odd yet comforting at the same time. Driving up towards the VIP entrance, I felt my heartbeat quicken, for a moment I felt that maybe things will be okay. We parked by the entrance and got out of the car. I haven’t been here in what feels like forever. I walk and look over into the garden below me, taking the view in. My eyes then try to focus into the atrium, empty. The atrium is empty. 

I always carry my student ID with me, so I pulled it out to tap it against the card reader to open the door. Red light. No unlocking sound. My friend tries hers, her GUID always in her phone case. Same outcome. That stung, it hurt not being able to enter a space I have so many fond memories in. With a lump in my throat and my eyes burning, I look at my friend with a small, forced smile. 

We stayed around the entrance, looking over the garden, into the atrium, and the hallways. I hold back my tears, refusing to cry. Suddenly, we see a familiar face walking the hallway towards us. A security guard I used to see every day opened the right door of the VIP entrance to talk to us. We greeted him enthusiastically and asked if we could come in. He refused, explaining that it is currently not allowed for anyone to go in. We tried to talk him into letting us in, but, rightfully so, he didn’t give in. We thanked him and wished him well. 

My friend and I slowly start walking towards the car and ultimately hop in. The lump in my throat grows bigger and my heart starts to ache. She moves the gear into drive and starts moving. I burst into tears, sobs escaping my throat. 

The physical act of driving away from GU-Q hurt so much, it felt like a piece of me was being ripped away. I did not want to drive away. I want to enter the building. I want to go into the atrium. Simply thinking about how I felt in that moment brings tears to my eyes and makes me feel devastated. 

Everyone around me went back to their normal routines, back to work, university, and school. My cousins attending Qatar University and the University of Doha for Science and Technology, are already back to their in-person classes. We’re the only ones stuck. Stuck in a position that does not feel fitting. Life around us is going on as usual, but not our lives. I think this makes it more difficult for me to grapple with not going back to GU-Q. Why not me? Why am I not back to my normal routine? Why am I stuck here longing for something so close, yet somehow so far?

These are sentiments shared by many of us here in Doha, this I learned through numerous conversations I had. As one of my friends said: “We are desperate to go back to our community and our normal.” The same feeling is shared with those who left and are currently in their home countries. We all miss being in GU-Q together.  

They say that your time in university is the best four years of your life. I think I figured out why. During these four years we are constantly surrounded by community, people, and human connections. These things create an environment where humans thrive. It is in our human nature to crave connection, and we look for it wherever we go. So, being in a place like GU-Q, a place described by many as “warm,” is exactly what fulfils our innate need. Our community is so beautifully tight-knit and that is something to be appreciative of. 

With all that being said, I know that if I was able to go into GU-Q on April 8 I would have felt even more devastated. It is not the building I want to go back to, it is the community I long for, my community. The physical space is nothing without its people, without its life and soul, without you all. 

Writing this piece was extremely difficult and deeply emotional. Being a senior with less than two weeks left until the last day of classes, I know I won’t be able to go back to the community of GU-Q for these last moments, not with everyone there at least. But I wish for things to completely go back to normal by next semester for everyone else. I wish for the community to come back together stronger and more grateful for one another. It truly is a blessing to have such an amazing community by your side, so be more grateful for it. 

I am writing this on April 11, patiently waiting for an announcement set to come out on April 16 on the plan for Commencement. My final wish and request is to have an in-person Commencement in May with everyone from my batch there, every single person in attendance. Please. 

Note: it seems like this is my last publication with The Georgetown Gazette. I would like to express my appreciation for everyone on the team and for having this platform to convey my thoughts. Thank you to everyone who read my work and engaged with it, truly grateful for you all!